Failing to Get It
by Harlequinny
Summary: Beast Boy muses over Raven's complex nature, and his failiure to understand it... One-shot. R&R-- I may add more if you ask nicely!
1. Never Ever

((A/N: Second fanfiction ever, after the first one bombed—feel free to check that out out though. One-shot. It was just an idea that stuck with me in the immense tumult of my thoughts, and so I decided to give it a go and see how it turned out. Its birthing was surprisingly easy, and it was a good way to loosen up my constant Block. I could probably put up one or two more short chapters if you guys so request, but only if you guys ask for it. Personally, I'm satisfied with where it is now... I'm a great lover of angst, and more than anything, I know that people want what they can't have. I'm not trying to imply any kind of lovey-dovey attraction in this fic... More like the kind of fondness that makes a friend wonder about another. I do love BB/Rae, though, if you must know. The two of them, however, are just so unfamiliar around the territories of love and such emotions that there would be no way they would ever step into those boundaries. Neither of them get it.))

**Failing to Get It**

Sunlight poured through the windows, illuminating the living area of Titans Tower.

Beast Boy sighed, feeling his mood deflate slightly as his gaze passed over the single shadow cast in the light.

It was noon—The sun was at its peak. The cobalt sky sparkled endlessly, having brushed away all of its clouds with the summer breeze.

But she still hovered there, meditating, as always.

It wasn't just a rainy-day practice, or something that she reserved for the quiet of night.

Getting rid of emotions must just be one of those all-hours things—Like video games, he supposed. It was the closest analogy he could relate to.

Even after the incident with her mirror, he failed to understand why Raven had to be like this.

Then again, he could hardly stand to imagine her any other way.

When he'd seen her personified emotions, he'd been more than a little concerned; that just hadn't been his Raven.

...Wait—Had he just thought, _His_ Raven?

That was how used to her he was, he supposed. He'd become comfortable around her.

They were friends.

Raven just wouldn't be Raven without her 'eccentric quirks,' if they could be called that...

The meditation, the quashed feelings, the silent companionship—It was all hers.

Levity wasn't an emotion—He's seen her smile a few times, even laugh once in a blue moon.

He'd seen her get upset—She'd accidentally blown a few things up when Cyborg had threatened to leave the group that one time, even though she didn't like to admit it.

She'd even come to understand everybody a little bit better... And everybody had come at least a little closer to understanding her.

But it was him with which she was most unforgiving.

He never meant to offend her, but it always just... _happened_.

She'd never laughed at one of his jokes before, not once.

Considering all of his attempts, that was a lot of chances.

She could've at least given him some sign that she was listening.

Was there something wrong with him? Something she didn't like more than most people?

Of course, he wouldn't change her.

Never, ever.

He wouldn't even think about it.

Raven was Raven. They all loved her for herself.

But... what he wouldn't give to see her laugh at one of his jokes, just once.

((A/N: Read and Review... Reviews make me happy, and I write more when I'm happy. No flames, please. They are rude and unhelpful. Besides, I will simply delete it if you still decide to annoy me after this.))


	2. Ignorance, Bliss, and Freedom

((A/N: Well, I got at least one review encouraging me to write one. I was thinking about doing the next one in Raven's perspective as well, just as I was writing it... Thank you so much for reviews! They _do_ make me so happy. You guys keep reviewing, and I'll keep puttin' 'em when I think about them. I haven't written in awhile, so it's good to get these things out... I'm open to any appealing suggestions or constructive criticism.))

**Failing to Get It**

Chapter 2

..._Azareth Metrion Zinthos..._

Ignorance is bliss.

..._Azareth Metrion Zinthos..._

It wasn't really something Raven knew from personal experience; Bliss is something she has never encountered.

...After all, tight reigns of self-control allow for little margin in the way of emotions.

..._Azareth Metrion Zinthos..._

But logic greatly appealed to her. It was rigid, well-defined.

Logic had no difficult abstract concepts to deal with.

..._Azareth Metrion Zinthos..._

Logic applies here:

Raven is not ignorant.

Beast Boy is ignorant.

..._Azareth Metrion Zinthos..._

Beast Boy is blissful.

Raven is not.

..._Azareth Metrion Zinthos..._

Therefore, ignorance must be bliss, and bliss is ignorance.

..._Azareth Metrion Zinthos..._

It's a bit of a conundrum, really.

One who knows so much least understands the concept of not knowing anything.

..._Azareth Metrion Zinthos..._

Raven set her feet down on the floor, abruptly leaving the darkness of her peaceful mind and entering into full sunlight as she opened her eyes.

It was no use meditating when thoughts pervaded even her best attempts at stillness.

She turned away, wondering how so much time could have possibly gone by.

It was noon now—Her meditation had started long before the sun had risen.

Sometimes she wondered if she would truly change herself if she could; She was hard-put to imagine anything other than the life she led...

Raven paused at the kitchen, poking at some burnt, unrecognizable vegan meal that still lay in a pan on the stove.  She presumed that it must've gone unattended while Cyborg and Beast Boy argued over breakfast that morning.

Deep down, she secretly envy Beast Boy.

It wasn't in a bad way, of course; She did not hate him. He was an earnest, heart-of-gold friend.

But he had _freedom._

His power allowed it; Any animal he so desired was his to take the form of.

It was his gift.

And hers was her curse.

As she opened the refrigerator, Raven wondered if Beast Boy ever pondered this kind of thing.

Probably not—He failed to get everything...

But maybe that was why he was so carefree.

((A/N: I honestly don't know where I'm going with this one. It was really just supposed to be a one-shot, but I decided to go and add Raven's POV.   I'll be hard-put to think of more stuff—Maybe Beast Boy will actually get it? But this is more of an internal-monologue, first-person/limited third person fic. No episode-esque action for this fic.  And no psychological-type reviews, either.  This is writing for pleasure, not a correct college thesis.))


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